Eighty Three at Sixty Three

My Dad is 63 - retired and old.  He has scored 83 out of 100 in a course in Spanish language! I am more excited than him, it seems.

After retirement, Dad enrolled himself for the course mainly to keep himself occupied. It had been his long time wish to learn a foreign language, but with family and professional commitments, he could not.

Dad was faced with the challenge posed by his age - "My brain is not that sharp anymore", he says, "and I find it difficult to study".

His classmates were much younger - perhaps our age or even less than that. Plus, when you head the family, you have to take care of so many things - be it home supplies, social commitments, taking care of my mother and his (my Granny), paying bills, and much more. Studying inspite of so much is a very very steep climb indeed.

"It was difficult", says Dad, as he caresses his certificate, "but I relished every bit of it." He did not give up when faced by adversities and wrenched out time to study between various activities. He is not very computer or internet savvy yet, but he got the cable operator to broadcast a Spanish channel on television. Now, that was innovative!

Isn't that awesome? Congratulate him here!

We are inspired by you, Dad. Love you.

Fighting the Invincible

A continuous shoulder pain led to a MRI scan and the results revealed a depressing fact: its not some

posture related or stress related problem it was suspected to be. It was cancer.

The very mention of the disease shakes your spirit. What is the condition of the patient, who is barely in her late thirties, a mother of two, has loads of dreams, when she is told that her disease is in an advanced stage and there is no known cure for it?

Shaila sat stunned as her doctor explained the implications of the spots that showed in the scan reports. But when she emerged, she was a woman of steel. 

She shared her predicament with her near and dear ones, but refused to let them be flustered. 

"It was no use being tensed about something out of one's control", she said, "Let's fight it out".

Chemotherapy sessions, medicines, bouts of illness, draining of savings, contradictory statements from various sources - it was a situation very difficult to deal with. Shaila stuck to her resolve, terming it as a challenge that life had thrown for her. 

There is a saying that you should not let the disease get into your mind. Shaila lived life like a confident woman, playing her multiple roles as a daughter, mother, wife, professional and more. She stuck to her medical commitments diligently. Today, more than 15 years after that dreadful day, Shaila lives to tell her tale. "Albeit few restrictions, I've faced such a scary disease head on, and have relished fighting it out." 

"Its awesome to be alive", she says, and hopes that her story shall be a source of inspiration for all cancer patients.

Pursuing His Heart

Rahul was with me in school. While we were listening to teachers, his mind would always wander to his guitar and music. Needless to say, he did not do well in the exams and after repeated attempts, could barely graze through school.

Bengalis may be a very open minded race, but they could have some limitations too. They think the world comes to an end if you do not do well in studies. His parents were apalled at his dismal marks, and were wondering how to get their boy back on track.

Rahul wanted to be a musician. He opposed his family and was ultimately thrown out of home and school. We had lost touch until one day, after good five years, I met him at a stage show.

Time had changed him, but somewhere deep within, he was still the school boy who studied with me. He recognized me in the crowd and jumped off the stage immediately after the performance. Long hair, confident attitude, a much sophisticated guitar hung around his neck - he seemed to have been reborn.

We exchanged numbers and next day, I met him for coffee, when he told me about his whereabouts in the interim period. He had to face the world on his own, without a place to call home and no money.

"But I had my baby", he said, holding his guitar up. Yes, he came for coffee with the instrument hung on his back.

I probed him for more details... and he spoke his heart out. Life had been harsh, but he had kept his cool and followed his heart. No matter what, he'd not part with his guitar. And gradually, he joined a music band who paid him on performance basis. Later his talent got recognized, and soon, he became a musician much in demand.

Looking at my spellbound expression, he said that he had relished the challenge the world posed for him, learnt a lot the harsh way, but has finally emerged victorious by clinging to his passion.

"No one asks for my degrees anymore", he grinned.

Granny Darling

Married at 17. Widowed at 33, while carrying her 5th child in her womb. My Granny - Mrs Anjali Mazumder.

Destiny threw this challenge at her. She was young and beautiful, widowed and mother of five. And without any source of income. To make matters worse, all relatives distanced themselves from her, for they did not want six extra mouths to feed.

Grandpa was about 45 when he had that sudden heart attack. He was a simple man, and had meagre savings. In those (pre- Indepence) times, salaries were low as well.

As if God was not pacified by Granny's plight, He added more suffering. She lost an eye, one of her knees went stiff. But what God perhaps overlooked was the fighter in the lady.

She struggled, sold her jewellery, did odd jobs and whatever she could do to bring her two daughters and three sons up. All of them are established and successful in their careers, married, have children and even grandchildren. Today, at 96, when she shares her memories from those days, she grins and says, "I've relished being challenged by Almighty, and my success story is being told by the next generations!"

Passionate about education herself, Granny can speak English fluently and has taught us during our childhood too. She has a sharp brain and has an exceptionally modern outlook. We are truly inspired by her.

Her 96th birthday is on this 25th June. May she be there to guide us all our lives. 

Stuck up There

My Dad was posted in Gangtok, a beautiful hill station - my Mom used to visit him with me and my brother every weekend from Calcutta, no matter what. We would start on Friday, reach on Saturday, again start on Sunday and attend school on Monday.

It was one such trip in July 1990 when North Bengal and Sikkim had received heavy rain. We were travelling from Siliguri to Gangtok, and midway on the hills, we found ourselves behind a series of vehicles, all stuck up because the road ahead was blocked by a large boulder.


Landslides are a pretty common phenomenon in this part of the world, especially in the rainy season. My brother and I, all of 10 and 11 years of age, got out our taxi to check the situation out. Mom was apprehensive, but she let us move out so long we remained in her line of vision. There were no mobile phones at that time, so there was no way one could communicate with anyone in the outer world.

A chill ran down our spines as we looked down - we were on the edge of a steep cliff, and the landslide had broken the barriers on the edge of the road. The boulder that blocked our way sat on a bed of smaller rocks and uprooted trees, and seemed to hold back the avalanche. The balance seemed delicate, and the slightest disturbance could bring the mountains down. 

There were people leaning against their vehicles or walking around, hoping that help would arrive. Our challenge was not to overcome this critical situation, but keep our cool.

Hours passed, sunlight dimmed. Our mom, along with others, was looking tensed. The idea of spending a night in the wilderness with two children was definitely scary.

We were lucky to be children - worry was something that we were unfamiliar with. The thrill of being in such a critical situation seemed to egg us on, and we seemed to relish the challenge of being completely helpless to Mother Nature.

My brother and I tried to speak to people who were complete strangers, whose languages were unknown to us (we could not speak Hindi too at that stage), and somehow lower the tension. No one had anything better to do, so they communicated with us through smiles, facial expressions and gestures. We kept the spirit up, and would not let anyone panic.

Late evening, an army truck came downhill and took charge of the situation. They put some sandfilled gunny bags and made a stable path for people to cross. They managed to interchange passengers from one side with those on the other; so that they could use each other's vehicles to move towards their destinations.

The present rainy season has brought back memories of a this scary experience. I've been hearing of tourists and pilgrims stuck up in the hills - I can identify with their plight, and hope that this blogpost brings some ray of hope to them.
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Photo: An old one scanned for you - the monkey watches human beings in distress.

From DINK to SINK

We were a happy to be DINK couple - Double Income No Kids. Until one day, when my husband, the member with the larger income, chose to give up his job and go in for full time studies.

While his challenge lay in being a student after a long break, mine was running the family on single income.

We estimated we could barely manage and let him pursue his heart. 

A beep on my mobile phone changed all our calculations. It was a sms informing me that a cheque has bounced. Unable to recognize the transaction, I enquired with by bank and was informed that I would have to pay EMIs for my housing loan from that month.

"Wait a minute!", my brain screamed, "But they were not supposed to start now! I've just come down on single income and you want me to pay half my salary for instalments? That too, above rent?" 

It was a sticky situation - how to manage? Life had thrown a bouncer at me, waiting for me to live up to the challenge.

How I survived those two years is a long story - cutting down on recreation, optimizing on resources. It was tough, very tough. But after the initial phase, I realized that I was relishing the challenge - it was a learning experience. The fighter in oneself is rejuvinated and you can take on any challenge.

Thankfully, we are back to our professional versions. And now we look back on those days of hardship for inspiration, sharing our experience, and feeling awesome about it.